Project Puck
by INFJgamer
Summary: Ryder and Suvi unleash Puck the Elf on the crew. The Tempest team are about to get the Elf on the shelf experiance.


**November 30th**

Suvi's first Christmas in Andromeda had been horrendous. She spent most of the day fighting back the tears that threatened to escape every time she thought about home and her family. She missed the mixed faith menagerie that was her parents house at Christmas. Dad cooking while she laid the table, her siblings tormenting each other and her mother trying to corral all of them.

The second Christmas had been rather different. She'd been on the Tempest with Drack cooking a feast while she laid the table. Peebee and Cora tormented each other while Lexi despaired over the amount everyone was drinking. Later she'd snuck off with Sara to exchange gifts, kisses and embraces.

The third Christmas had been a similar affair. Drack cooking with Peebee being dragged out of the galley by Vetra for stealing tidbits. Gil modifying the amount of explosives in the crackers with Cora on standby with a fire extinguisher. Lexi had loosened up a little and was administering recovery shots. Later there had been snatched kisses under the mistletoe before finally unwrapping Sara and making love to her.

This was Suvi's fourth December in Andromeda, but her first one being married to Sara. Since they'd said their vows they'd merged family traditions and started to create some of their own.

Ryder and Suvi giggled as they crept quietly through the ship. The Ryder family elf Puck was one of the few things that Sara had brought to Andromeda with her (not counting her collection of Blasto memorabilia). They placed the elf on top of a cupboard in the galley and stuck a large notice beneath it.

 _Hello I'm Puck an elf from Earth_

 _Here to cause mischief and mirth_

 _Your ship is looking kind of glum_

 _So decorate it everyone!_

They left a trail of red string that would guide the crew to the pile of decorations in the cargo bay that were waiting to be put up. Happy with their handiwork, the pair headed off to bed. Come the morning, come the mayhem.

 **December 1st**

It was Peebee that found the elf and the note. She ran into the crew's various quarters loudly exclaiming that the ship had a Christmas elf. Cora threw her pillow at the excited young maiden, but she'd already run off to wake the others.

Ellis had never observed Christmas before, they stared open mouthed at the large tree that had been assembled in the cargo bay. Sara wandered over to her friend and placed the star shaped tree topper into their hands "Seems as this is your first real Christmas, it's only right that you do the honours."

The tree was nearly two feet taller than the mercenary, so Sara and Peebee used their biotics to lift Ellis up so they could reach the top. A cheer erupted as they put the star in place. "So why a star? The Company never let us study religion."

Gil took Ellis off to the galley for a crash course on the Christmas story, Jaal tagged along as he found human religion a fascinating topic. He enjoyed observing all of the different festivals to gain a better understanding of humanity.

Drack had dozed off in the cargo bay having made cooked breakfasts for the crew. Peebee regarded Cora "Bet you twenty credits you couldn't hang a decoration on Drack."

Cora hated how easy it was for Peebee to bait her. She picked up a bauble and snuck up to Drack, just as she placed the thread of the decoration over a rivet in his armour, he woke up. Once he dozed off again Peebee tried to suspend a bauble from one of the bones that adorned his armour, but she was swatted away while he slept. The disappointed pair headed off to the galley to grab some breakfast. When they returned, they discovered Drack was covered in decorations. Tinsel was wrapped around the bones and baubles hung from rivets. Stood next to the snoring festive Krogan was a smug looking Doctor Lexi T'Perro. Peebee was impressed "How did you do that?"

The doctor smiled kindly "Peebee, these hands have performed complex surgery on multiple species, they're more than capable of hanging a few decorations on a sleeping Krogan. Now, I believe you owe me twenty credits."

 **2nd December**

Drack stretched and yawned. As his eyes begrudgingly opened he spotted the elf with a note saying

 _Teach a skill to the next person you see_

The next person that Drack saw was a ravenous Jaal, he asked if there was any chance the Krogan make him some pancakes for breakfast. "No." he gestured to the note by the elf "But I'll teach you how to make them. Start by grabbing the flour."

Drack had him measure out and mix the flour, eggs, milk and oil finishing of with a tiny pinch of salt. Jaal was by no means the neatest cook and globules of the mixture spattered the surfaces of the galley. Drack demonstrated how to grease the pan, then cooked the first pancake. It was all Jaal could do to stop himself drooling as he watched Drack flip it and catch it in the pan. "Okay kid, your turn."

Jaal decanted the mixture into the pan and made sure that it covered the base evenly. Next came the flip, Jaal only caught half of it in the pan and had to quickly flick his wrist to rescue it. Drack chuckled "Nice save kid."

Once it was cooked, Jaal sampled the fruits of his labour slathered in syrup. It was delicious. He quickly wolfed it down and started cooking another, then another until an impressive stack began to form on the galley counter. The more he cooked, the more confident he become, especially when it came to tossing the pancakes. Peebee had been drawn to the galley by the smell, stomach growling in anticipation. Jaal got a little carried away with the final pancake and it flipped out of the pan, landing squarely on top of her head. Without missing a beat, Peebee swiped it off of her crest, put in on a plate, drenched it with syrup and ate it. "Hmm, not bad Jaal, but I think I'm going to need to taste a few more before I can given you the official Peebee seal of approval."

 **3rd December**

Gil found Puck perched on a console in the engine room. The note simply said

 _Rewrite a festive tune._

On this particular morning, Gil wasn't feeling festive. He desperately missed his daughter and would've given anything to be with her. He remembered listening to an old Earth song called Stop the Cavalry about a soldier who just wanted to go home for Christmas. It seemed as apt a song as any. Gil grabbed his datapad and tapped away. Once he finished he published it to the crew's message board.

 _Director Tann swans over here_

 _Cos he's the authority_

 _But it's very cold out here in the snow,_

 _Guarding Voeld from the enemy_

 _Oh we say it's tough, we've all had enough_

 _Can we turn the heat up please?_

 _We have had to fight, almost every night_

 _Since we hit this galaxy_

 _That is when we say, oh yes yet again_

 _Can we have a payrise please?_

 _Friends and family wait at home_

 _In a Roekaar and Kett free zone_

 _Wish I could be sleeping now_

 _Instead of pulling a double shift_

 _Bang! That's another Kett or some other threat_

 _While Addison and Kandros have tea_

 _If we get home, live to tell the tale_

 _We'll run for Andromedan presidency_

 _If we get elected we'll have - we'll have a holiday please_

 _Wish I could be sleeping now_

 _Instead of pulling a double shift_

 _Friends and family wait at home_

 _They've been waiting far too long_

 _But at least we're going home for Christmas_

 _P.S Hang on Meredith, Daddy will be home soon x_

 **4th December**

Vetra and Kallo headed into the galley wanting to beat the early morning rush for the coffee machine. Puck was ready and waiting for them with a note and a selection of ingredients for gingerbread cookies for each of the species that lived on the Tempest.

 _To the finder of this note_

 _Use the ingredients below to make festive treats for the crew._

Vetra wasn't the galaxy's greatest cook, nor was Kallo for that matter. The Salarian did have his vast memory at his disposal to help them though. He'd watched Drack and Suvi cook on countless occasions in theory all he had to do was replicate what he'd seen. He rolled up his sleeves and tied Suvi's pinecone print apron around him. "If I can navigate the scourge, then I can navigate a kitchen. Verta please preheat the oven."

Vetra watched as Kallo seemed to perform magic before her very eyes, rolling out the different gingerbread doughs while humming Rocking Around the Christmas tree. Vetra helped by pressing a star shaped cutter into the detro mix that would become her biscuits once baked.

"How are we going to know if these are okay?" Asked Vetra sniffing the Human/Asari biscuits with suspicion.

Kallo gave a knowing smile "If my memory serves me correctly, and it always does, the solution is about to present herself."

As if on cue a ravenous Peebee appeared at the galley door "That smells great."

Vetra grabbed a silicone spoon and prepared to whack the young Asari if she tried to steal any of the freshly baked biscuits. Kallo shook his head "Now Vetra, that's no way to treat our guinea pig."

"Huh?" Said Peebee more focused on the gingerbread cookies than on the exchange that had just transpired.

Kallo gestured to the galley seats "Nothing Peebee, please have a seat and try a biscuit."

The hungry maiden devoured the cookie in two bites, licked her lips and asked for more. Kallo smiled "I think it's safe to say that they're a successes."

As Kallo and Vetra congratulated each other on a job well done, Peebee reached out to grab some more cookies. There was the briefest exchange of glances between the two cooks before Vetra bought the heavy silicone spoon crashing down onto the back of Peebee's hand.

 **5th December**

Puck was in his usual place in the galley when Drack and Vetra found him. Beneath him was an note that read

 _One, two three, four_

 _I declare a snow war!_

 _You're all going to Voeld for a snowball fight!_

"If you think I'm going quads deep in the cold stuff, you've got another thing coming. I'll stay here with Prospero and make sure you've got something warm waiting for you when you get back." chuckled the Krogan.

As soon as the Tempest touched down on Voeld, the crew split into two teams. Ryder's consisted of Suvi, Kallo, Lexi and Ellis. Cora had Jaal, Vetra, Peebee and Gil on her team. Each team had twenty minutes to build snow forts and make as many snowballs as they could. Peebee got distracted and wanted to make something else, she called over to Cora "Do you wanna build a snowman? It doesn't have to be a snowman."

"Go away!" snapped Cora sculpting densely packed balls of snow.

"Okay, bye." with that Peebee trudged off to help Jaal build the wall of snow that they would hide behind.

With the twenty minutes had gone the two teams took up their positions behind the snow forts. It was agreed that no one was allowed to use biotics. Ryder counted down "5, 4, 3, 2, 1 attack!"

Cora's team sent a volley of snowballs in the Pathfinder's direction, while Kallo managed to get a direct hit on Gil. Clumps of snow stuck to the startled engineer's beard. Peebee tried to breach the Pathfinder's fort be launching a head on assault. It was going great until she went arse over tit on the ice and skidded into a bank of snow. Lexi went to check her over, but luckily only the Asari's pride was wounded. Peebee decided that she'd had enough of snowball fights and snuck of to do something more creative with the snow. She occasionally looked up from her work to see Ryder getting pelted and belly laughed when Lexi and Suvi teamed up to launch a volley on Cora. No one had noticed Ellis sneak off until it was too late, the merc stuffed a snowball down the back of Cora's modified armour making her scream. With the battle over Ryder wandered over to see what Peebee had been doing.

"It's a snow Krogan or snowgan for short." explained Peebee

"It's a pretty good likeness for our resident cook. Speaking of, let's go and see what he's made for us." smiled Ryder.

 **6th December**

Puck was sat on a large table in the cargo bay next to what looked like a miniature skittle alley. The pins were made from empty shotgun shells that had been covered in glitter and instead of balls there were sprouts. There was a handmade trophy that was an AI mug that had been dunked in glue, then dunked in iridescent white glitter. It was both pretty and tacky at the same time. Puck's note simply said

 _The highest score takes home the trophy!_

Cora thought that mini bowling balls was a far more appealing use for the vegetable as opposed to a food stuff. She had less than pleasant Christmas dinner memories of being told she had to eat at least three sprouts before she was allowed to have any pudding. It was late morning when sprout bowling tournament began. Drack was far too heavy handed and accidentally squished a sprout between his finger and thumb. Under normal circumstances Peebee would have laughed but she, along with Lexi and Gil were constantly throwing gutter balls.

The crack shots of the crew Ryder, Vetra, Jaal and Ellis were struggling too. Due to the uneven shape of the sprout it was almost impossible to predict how it would roll down the lane. Even Prospero with his infinite capacity for calculations wasn't doing well.

Kallo had managed to get a couple of strikes, he credited it to his piloting skills. However it was Cora that ended up beating everyone hands down. While she told the crew it was a lucky fluke, the truth was that she was no stranger finding ingenious ways to move sprouts around. In order to meet her parents strict three sprouts or no pudding rule, Cora had mastered the art of rolling and flicking the hideous vegetables off of her plate and into a suitable hiding place when the adults weren't looking. Having "eaten" the sprouts she would devour a large slice of Christmas cake, always saving the marzipan and icing until last.

Ryder handed her the sparkly trophy and crew applauded her victory "Congratulations Cora, how about a bowl of Drack's sprout soup to celebrate?"

Cora urged at the thought "No thanks. If it's all the same to you, I'm good with the glittery cup."

 **7th December**

Lexi made her way into the med bay cradling her cup of tea. Puck was sat on her desk with a note and small packets contains what looked like spices

 _Paging Dr T'Perro_

 _Help us beat the winter blues_

 _With some rather festive brews_

Lexi looked at the packets in closer detail, each contained the spices needed to make Turian, Angaran, Krogan, Asari and Human mulled cider. Lexi had an ample understanding of pharmacology but concocting boozy beverages had never been her thing. "Damn it Ryder I'm a doctor not a mixologist!"

The doctor tapped on the comms button "Gil meet me in the galley. Don't worry this isn't medical, it's medicinal."

"Well Doctor you did the right thing coming to me." Grinned Gil as he began to pour the liquid component of each drink into five separate pans.

Once the liquids had come up to temperature they began to add the spices. The smell of the Human drink took Gil back to his student days. On the last day of term, he'd pack his bag and head off back to Surrey. He'd spend Christmas with his mother every year and it was this drink that greeted him when he walked through the door. The smell took Lexi back to her time working in hospitals on Earth, namely a particularly messy staff Christmas party. While healthcare workers know all too well the perils of drink, they still screwed up just as much as anyone else under its influence. Subsequently there was a dodgy vid of Dr T'Perro dancing to the Macarena with the head of trauma and orthopedics and a random gynaecology registrar. Harry had yet to let her live that one down, she hoped to the Goddess he hadn't bought a copy of the vid with him to Andromeda.

The aroma of spices and alcohol began to permeate the ship. The Asari spiced brew's scent was like a siren's call to Peebee. The maiden stood in the doorway of the galley salivating pleading with Gil for a taster. While the engineer was distracted, Lexi dipped a spoon into the pan containing the Asari brew and lifted it to her lips. She gently blew on it before sampling it. The taste was amazing, but the potency almost blew her head off. She regarded her brewing buddy "We're going to need a lot of recovery shots to mop up the aftermath of this!"

 **8th December**

Cora spotted Puck out of the corner of her eye. The elf was sat on the pile of spare tyres beside the Nomad. The note read

 _The finder of this elf gets to drive the Nomad_

Cora had driven the Nomad on countless occasions so it held no appeal to her. If anything she sometimes found Puck's presence on the ship an unwelcome distraction from the issues she was trying to work through. When she saw Peebee bumble into the cargo bay looking for tools to work on POC, a thoroughly questionable idea popped into her head. What if she let Peebee find the elf and let her be the one to drive the Nomad? Maybe it would put pay to Ryder and Suvi's elf antics for once and for all. "Hey Peebee, if you're looking for Gil's wrench set it was by the spare tires yesterday."

"Thanks Cora." The young Asari was doing her best to play nicely with the commando, it was Christmas time after all.

There was a shrill, excited squeak as Peebee found Puck and the note. Cora smiled in spite of herself as she watched the maiden bounce off in search of Ryder, but why? Was it getting even with Ryder and Suvi or the utter joy that Peebee had found in something so simple.

Ryder almost choked on her coffee as Peebee bounded into the galley and waved the note under her nose. Ryder had meant for Lexi to find it, she thought it might be nice for the doctor to experience something new. Clearly fate and Puck (and Cora) had other plans and so it was the Peebee took the Nomad for a spin on Eos. Ryder commandeered Ellis to tag along in case Peebee's driving warranted emergency biotic shields. Peebee beamed "Okay everyone buckle up. Since I'm driving, I finally get to pick the music."

The maiden tapped away at her omintool, Ellis groaned as Britney Spears greatest hits were pumped through the Nomad's speakers. Peebee revved the engine and drove off gradually working through the gears, picking up speed. As she hit the first really steep hill, she switched to six wheel drive and drove onwards. Ryder was amazed at how good a driver Peebee actually was, she was contemplating lifting the Nomad ban. Peebee warbled along happily with the music "You drive me crazy. I just can't sleep. I'm so excited, I'm in too deep. Oh crazy. But it feels alri- Hey, what does this button do?"

Before Ryder could say anything, a blue digit depressed the button activating the ejector seats! The trio were catapulted from the Nomad and sent flying through the air, stopping inches short of the ground, saved only by biotic suspension. Ryder lost her lunch. Peebee frowned "I guess this means I'm still banned from driving the Nomad?"

"Abso-fucking-lutely!" grumbled Ryder wiping away the vomit from her mouth.

 **9th December**

Lexi found Puck sat on her desk in the med bay with a note that simply read

 _Happy Birthday Harry_

Doctor Harry Carlyle often felt cheated by having a December birthday. Restaurants were always busy with Christmas parties, and people were usually far too busy or broke to help him celebrate. When Ella was alive, she'd gone out of her way to make it special for him. But she was gone and it was now down to Lexi to make the day memorable. Her first port of call was Drack, the culinary Krogan was already in the galley writing up a shopping list. "I need your help. Any chance you could make a birthday cake for Harry?"

Drack shrugged and gestured to the empty cupboards "I'm all out of flour Doc." He noticed the full carton of eggs on the side and grinned "How about a birthday pavlova?"

With Drack busy baking, Lexi headed off to see Vetra in the hope of sourcing a gift. Harry was partial to white wine and she hoped that Vetra might be able to get her hands on a decent bottle of pinot grigio. However there was none to be had at short notice. Gil appeared and offered an alternative "I've got a micro cask of blonde beer I'm will to part with. Not too strong with hint of citrus."

The doctor hugged Gil, feeling his soft whiskers brush against her cheek "Thanks Gil, I owe you one."

With gift and cake (well pavlova) sorted Lexi made her way to Harry's apartment on Meridian. She found her friend ironing a suit, the unmistakable scent of cologne lingering on him as he hugged her. "Okay, who is she?"

Harry flushed a little "It's not like that."

" _But the suit and cologne say you want it to be"_ thought Lexi.

Harry explained between mouthfuls of pavlova "We're both lonely Lexi. We both are. She recently found out her husband died, she's still processing that loss. This is just dinner."

Lexi picked out a tie while Harry finished ironing his shirt. "I know it's just dinner, but you don't make this effort for just anyone Harry. Do I at least get to know her name?"

The human doctor turned beetroot "Promise not to tell _anyone_? Ellen Ryder."

 **10th December**

Puck was sat in the cargo bay with a sprig of mistletoe and a note that read

 _Caution! Handle with care_

 _Hang it up and then beware!_

Vetra chuckled to herself and grabbed the mistletoe and placed where it would cause the most havoc, right over the doors of the med bay. Under normal circumstances, it wouldn't have been a problem however today the crew were due their pre Christmas medicals. Lexi noted the dreaded white berries suspended over the door but before she could get into the med bay, Drack arrived for his check up. The Krogan took her hand and kissed it. "I wouldn't want to step on the kid's toes." He chuckled.

As Drack left it was time for Ryder's appointment. The Pathfinder stood on her tiptoes and placed a kiss on his cheek. Ryder headed out as Suvi arrived, the two locked lips without hesitation. Suvi broke the kiss only to catch her wife's bottom lip between her teeth. "Later." She teased before heading in for her check up.

Next it was Vetra's turn placing a kiss on the forehead of the Scotswoman as she exited the med bay. As the Turian made to leave, Jaal entered. The Angaran hugged her warmly and placed a friendly kiss on her mandibles. Vetra felt she'd fared reasonably well out of the crew. But things were about to take a turn for the interesting as Kallo approached the door of the med bay. Salarians were not known for being tactile, but Kallo accepted Jaal's embrace in the spirit of friendship. When Kallo headed out, it was into the path of Peebee. He placed a kiss on the forehead of the petite Asari who smiled at the gesture. Now came the moment Vetra had been waiting for as Cora and Peebee eyed each other with mutual terror. "I'm game if you are!" lied Peebee.

"Oh kiss off!" retorted Cora shoving her way past her.

Peebee shrugged and thought to herself " _But would you have done that if I was Ash?"_

Gil was waiting for Cora with a cheeky grin on his face. He knew she wasn't a big fan of facial hair and he was currently sporting a full beard. The two kissed and Cora couldn't help but let out a chuckle as his moustache tickled her nose "Urg it's like kissing a squirrel!"

Gil finally escaped the doctor's clutches only to find the corridor empty. It dawned on him that it was probably a tad unethical from Lexi to perform a check up on her paramour. He grabbed the mistletoe and found Ellis at the load out station fixing one of Peebee's pistols. He planted a huge whiskery kiss on the mercenary's cheek before handing over the mistletoe to them "For Lexi, not that I think you'll need it."

 **11th December**

Prospero's lens focused on the note beneath the elf

 _Makes something for someone_

In his opinion, the instructions were vague at best. He walked around the ship observing the crew, trying to see if any of them needed anything, he failed to see the point in providing someone with a non functional gift. His auditory circuits picked up a choice selection of Turian curses coming from Vetra's room. Carefully he peered around the corner to see Vetra picking up her now damaged rifle and put in back on the shelf that didn't really accommodate its dimensions. He could see that the stock was cracked from striking against the ground. "I will take it to the Mercenary for repair."

Vetra nodded and handed him the damaged rifle "Thanks Prospero."

The Geth made his way the the bridge where the merc was tinkering with one of Peebee's pistol's. "Vetra broke her rifle stock. Can you repair it?"

Ellis glanced at the cracked stock and sighed "Again? I wish she'd store her guns up here like everyone else. Leave it there and I'll sort it."

Prospero looked at the gun racks that adorned the far wall. If Verta had a gun rack, her rifles wouldn't fall. Prospero know exactly what he was going to make for Vetra. He got scrap metal from Peebee, tools from Gil and schematics and dimensions of weaponry from Ellis. It didn't take long for him to fashion a functional gun rack for the Turian. He waited until she was in the galley with Drack, then went to her quarters to install it. He'd just hung up the last of her guns including the one mended by Ellis when she walked in "Vetra, I miscalculated the time of your return."

Vetra eyed him suspiciously "What are you up to?"

He gestured to the new gun rack "An elf told me to do it."

 **12th December**

Jaal excitedly read the note beside Puck

 _Someone has hidden the star from our tree_

 _Follow the map to return it to me_

He examined the datapad and shot off to wake Kallo "We need to go to Eos, immediately."

Jaal studied the map with Cora who knew Eos like the back of her hand. She and Vetra had been the ones that helped Ryder explore the planet when they first arrived in the galaxy. Cora recognised the first location straight away, it was where the Tempest had landed the first time the team had touched down on Eos. The commando donned her modified armour and smiled at the beaming Angaran "Let's do this."

"Hold up, you need another squad member before you head off, it might as well be me!" Peebee was practically bouncing with excitement.

"Actually I've asked Kallo to join us for this one. He's committed every map of Eos into that huge memory of his, that makes him the perfect choice for this mission." replied Cora.

"But!" Whined Peebee, sad she was missing out on the action.

"But no buts." Cora stepped closer and added in a whisper "Unless you want the crew to know about Mister Snookleboodle."

Peebee blushed a shade of purple that complimented her coat and hissed "Ash told you about Mister Snookleboodle? I'm going to kill him! I bet he was drinking Mojitos, he's always a gossip when he's got a few of them on board."

Mister Snookleboodle was a cuddly stuffed toy Pyjak. He had been a gift from Ash that was guaranteed to scare away the bothersome monster that a very young Peebee was adamant was living under her bed. He was one of the few things that Peebee had taken to Andromeda with her. Currently Mister Snookleboodle was sat on a shelf in Peebee's quarters hidden behind a piece of Rem tech.

With Peebee out of the way, Cora, Jaal and Kallo climbed aboard the Nomad and headed off towards the first location. None of them had noticed the small furry stowaway that was napping in the rear storage hold of the vehicle. They arrived at the first site and Jaal scanned the area for a clue as to where to go next. There was a ping as a message flashed up _Away team report to engineering_.

"My guess is we need to go to Gil's place, you know the way Kallo?" Cora realised she'd asked a stupid question, Kallo knew the location of everything.

Kallo didn't mind, in fact he very much enjoyed driving the Nomad. He preferred it to a Mako hands down. The Mako was the only vehicle that Kallo had almost crashed. Once they arrived at Gil's placed Jaal scanned for the next clue _Hit reset to start over._

"That has to be the Vault. Let's go!" Said Kallo, already turning over the engine.

"Wait for me." yelled Cora.

It was loud enough to cause the sleeping stowaway to stir. Rabbit blinked lazily, yawned and climbed out of the storage compartment. He kept hidden as they drove to the Vault entrance. When the Nomad stopped and the doors opened, he sniffed the alien air excitedly. He awkwardly flopped out of the Nomad and landing in a cute furry heap. The dusty ground felt good on his paws, it was warm and grainy. Rabbit felt an overwhelming urge to have a dust bath in it, which is exactly what he did. He watched the people trying to dig a hole, Well one was trying to dig while the other two supervised. Rabbit snuck between Kallo's legs and assisted Jaal with the digging. He paws quickly found the little box buried beneath the earth. It smelt like his humans. Jaal opened the box excitedly "We've done it! We've found the star!"

"Never mind the star!" Groaned Kallo "What about Rabbit? He's filthy! Who's going to tell Suvi we accidentally kidnapped her dog and let him get into this state?"

"Well as the most senior member of the crew present, I nominate you to break the news Kallo." smirked Cora.

Kallo looked dirt covered hound and swallowed hard "Kill. Me. Now."

 **13th December**

Kallo thought the world of Suvi and Ryder, but that elf was a menace. He and Vetra had been the unfortunate souls that had found the note saying

 _Nick nack paddy whack_

 _Give the dog a bath_

 _This old elf could use a laugh_

Rabbit was by no means a fast dog, his bad back had put pay to that. He was however small and hellbent that no one was giving him a wash today. He'd had a perfectly good dust bath on Eos yesterday. When he rubbed against the crew he left sand prints on them to show how much he loved them. Ryder's and Suvi's trousers had borne the brunt of his sandy tributes.

Vetra had filled a shallow tub with warm water and gone to grab him. He bolted between Kallo's legs and made his way to the cargo bay, ducking under workstations for cover. Vetra had shot forwards trying to catch him only the loose her footing on the wet floor. She careered backwards into the tub with a loud "Fuck!"

A dripping wet Vetra cussed Kallo for failing to stop the dog, sensing the two were distracted Rabbit crept under the Nomad and hid. Cora watched from the balcony and smiled. Despite being in a back brace and hind leg splints the little hound was running rings around them. Her own brace was becoming like a second skin to her now, helping her slowly heal from her spinal injury. She watched as Vetra and Kallo searched the cargo bay trying to find him, when they checked Lexi's room, the dog waddled off in the direction of the crew's quarters. Gil let out a belly laugh from his lofty perch outside of engineering. "You two couldn't catch a cold!"

Vetra glared "Okay wise ass, what would you do?"

Gil rummaged in Rabbit's basket finding his favourite toy, a rubber duck with one of those maddening squeakers. He made his way to the shower cubicle striped down to his boxers and squeezed the toy. Rabbit came running. The door snapped shut trapping Rabbit, Vetra and Kallo in the room. Gil flicked on the shower and proceeded to wash the hound while he chewed on his beloved squeaky toy. Kallo yelped as the spray from the showerhead doused his uniform "Watch where you're pointing that thing Gil!"

The engineer chuckled "Suck it up buttercup. You're an amphibian, you're supposed to like water."

Kallo sighed "Touche."

 **14th December**

It was Ellis that found Puck, he was sat in the kitchen with packets of popcorn and grexen along with a note that said

 _The finder of this elf chooses what films the crew watch tonight._

Ellis knew in a heartbeat what films they wanted to see and headed off to ask Kallo if they could borrow some of his vids. The pilot had bonded with the mercenary over these films, they'd watched them on the bridge nibbling away on kelp jerky and drinking vats of tea. Suvi often joined them, while the franchise wasn't her favourite, it was in her top five.

Come the evening there was a flurry of activity as the Pathfinder's quarters was steadily filled with additional seats. The franchise had spawned numerous movies, but Ellis had selected the original trilogy for the crew to watch. Blue letters appeared to a black background that read " _A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…"_

The Star Wars theme blared loudly the the crawl for A New Hope worked its way up the screen. Half way through The Empire Strikes Back, Cora protested "Urgh this is so unrealistic."

"Really? Because Vetra makes a pretty good Han Solo, Drack could be Chewie. Come on Cora you can't tell me you can't see the similarities between using the force and having biotics." Countered Kallo.

Ellis nodded "I force choked a guy back on Omega once."

Cora scoffed "Yeah right! Prove it!"

Cora instantly regretted saying it as she found herself being lifted out of her seat and suspended in the air. While Ellis didn't choke her, Cora realised that they easily could. With a dark smile the merc uttered "I find your lack of faith disturbing."

Peebee erupted into a fit of giggles, unable to decide which was more entertaining, Cora dangling in the air, or a merc with a Northern English accent trying to imitate Lord Vader. Kallo sprang up and stood next to Ellis imitating Vader's choke pose "It's more like this" he dropped his voice as low as he could and growled the line in Cora's direction.

Still suspended, the commando facepalmed, grumbling "Goddess preserve me I'm surrounded by dorks!"

 **15th December**

Suvi had crashed out and was snoring blissfully. It gave Ryder the perfect window of opportunity to work some mischief on Puck's behalf. Suvi awoke to the unwelcome klaxon of her alarm clock. She silenced it and rolled over to coax her wife out of bed. Ryder was not a morning person, it usually took two coffees before she could be deemed a functional human being. Suvi has perfected the art of evicting Sara from their bed, she'd stick her cold feet against the Pathfinder's warm ones and wait for an indignant yelp followed by "Okay I'm getting up!"

This morning there was no Sara, instead there was Puck with a note

 _Dr Anwar,_

 _Your presence is required in the port escape pod._

Suvi still clad in her pyjamas clambered into the escape pod where a grinning Sara was waiting for her. "I know that smile Sara. What are you up to?"

Sara gestured to the three bowls. The first was filled with pink marshmallows, the second with white ones and the third bowl contained a giant flump. "Pick a colour."

"White." Said Suvi raising an eyebrow.

"Disable the gravity SAM." Ordered Sara.

The marshmallows drifted into the air along with Sara and Suvi.

"Okay first one to eat all of their marshmallows and capture the giant flump without using their hands wins." Sara added with a wink "Prize to be determined by the winner."

Suvi wanted to say " _Either way you're going to be screwed."_ But instead bit down on the nearest floating white marshmallow.

The two scrambled and bumped around the escape pod frantically trying to get all of their marshmallows. Finally all that remained was the flump. The long spiral marshmallow drifted between the two of them. They both dived for it catching an end in their teeth. They kept taking mouthfuls until their lips met. Ryder quickly swallowed her mouthful of the fluffy sweet treat "Call it a draw?"

"My data confirms Dr Anwar ate the most of the flump and is therefor the winner." Chimed SAM

"Damn it!" huffed Sara "Name your prize."

Suvi drifted toward her wife and pulled her in close, working her way up Sara's neck with kisses until she reached her ear. She answered with an urgent whisper "You!"

 **16th December**

Puck was sat next to Ryder's Blasto branded cereal bowl. There wasn't any food in it, but twelve scrunched up pieces of paper. Puck's note read

 _It's Secret Santa time!_

 _Pick a name and buy a gift._

 _P.S no buying for your significant other._

Vetra managed to pull her own name out of the bowl, but on her second attempt she got Peebee. Clearly the Spirits were smiling on her as she knew exactly what to requisition for the maiden. With a couple of clicks on her omnitool the deed was done, she'd ordered a toy remote control Observer bot for Peebee.

Prospero pulled out Gil's name. This task would be much easier than the last one Puck had set him. He knew Gil and his working habits very well, he'd be far more efficient if he wasn't constantly looking for his tools. The Geth acquired a set of tracker tags for each of Gil's tools. The gift was both thoughtful and logical. Prospero was finally getting a hold of the whole gift giving thing.

Jaal had gotten Kallo. He remembered how proud Kallo was when he discovered that someone had painted a portrait of him with vintage flight goggles stood by the Tempest. Jaal worked with Vetra to secure a copy of the picture. A few tears of joy escaped as he imagined Kallo's smiling face when he unwrapped the gift on Christmas morning.

Ryder had drawn Drack's name from the bowl. She bought him a Krogan sized apron and hat with the words " _Kiss the cook"_ embroidered onto it. She chuckled to herself as she pictured him wearing it while cooking Krogan root vegetable fries for his Great Grandchildren.

Suvi got Jaal, it was a very easy for her to pick his gift. Jaal was still very much fascinated by Humanity and their customs and faiths. She got him a book chronicling the evolution of human faiths from around the Earth.

Cora had ended up getting Ryder. She chose a traditional Angaran compass, it seemed apt given that Ryder was still the Pathfinder.

Peebee excitedly shoved her hand into the bowl and rummaged around before pulling out Suvi's name. Peebee's gift required minimum effort but was guaranteed to delight the doctor. She ordered her a shipment of English Breakfast tea that had been grown on Eos. The potent brew made Peebee's teeth stand on end, but she knew Suvi couldn't get enough of the stuff.

Lexi had picked Vetra. She decided to give her something that would encourage the Turian to pamper herself. She got her a decadent shower gel and a carapace scrub made with sugar crystals and coarse grain Elaaden sand.

Gil grinned her he saw that he'd gotten Lexi. While the doctor had certainly lightened up a lot since joining the crew of the Tempest, her attire was still more drab than fab. Gil decided that it was high time that the woman had a little black dress. A quick rummage through Lexi's laundry bag had revealed her measurements and he picked out something that would accentuate her assets.

Drack let out a throaty chuckle as he read Prospero's name on the paper. He acquired a shoulder mounted grenade launcher for the Geth engineer. While it was rare for Prospero to engage in combat, Drack wanted him kitted out to the nines if he did.

Kallo had drawn Ellis's name. The pilot trawled through his memory searching for clues as to what the merc might need. He remembered how Ellis always felt the cold more when they were tired. The mercenary didn't own much in the way of clothing, so Kallo bought them a warm black hoodie.

Ellis pulled the remaining name form the bowl; Cora. Lieutenant Cora Harper hadn't had the best of years and was currently still in an exoskeleton while her back healed from being broken. Ellis though back to their conversation on Kadara about fighting. In time Cora would have to learn to fight again, but she'd need to adapt her style to her body's new limitations. Ellis remembered a human martial artist who'd modified his style to allow for poor vision and a leg length discrepancy. His teachings would be perfect for the healing commando. Ellis tapped on their omnitool and ordered a copy of Bruce Lee's _The Tao of Jeet Kune Do_ for Cora.

Now all the crew would have to do was wait until Christmas Day to find out what they'd gotten.

 **17th December**

Puck had issued a simple task to the whole crew of the Tempest.

 _Tell the crew the highlight of your year and what you are thankful for._

The crew spent the day reflecting upon the year that was fast coming to a close. After dinner they sat in the Pathfinders quarters and took turns to say what had been their highlight this year and what it was they were thankful for.

Gil began "Seeing Meredith take her first steps was the highlight of my year. I am thankful that I get to go home for Christmas and spend some time with my little girl."

Kallo was next "My highlight was Suvi's stag party. The biotic cannonballs, the toasted marshmallows and the fireworks. I loved it all. I am thankful that I can remember every single second of it."

Prospero stood up "The consensus among the Geth of Andromeda is we are thankful to be free of Reaper control. The highlight of our time on Andromeda has been helping the Quarians establish their home world."

Vetra drained her drink and took a turn "One of the highlights of this year was starting my own business. It's good to know that me and Sid have a real future here in Andromeda. I'm thankful to you guys for helping me get it."

Cora shook her head "Crazy as it sounds, the highlight of my year was feeling Lexi stabbing my foot with a pin. I was so scared I'd never feel my legs again, let alone walk. I'm thankful to Peebee, Ellis and Vetra for keeping me alive while we were stuck on that planet and I'm thankful for everything Lexi and Harry did to help me walk again."

Jaal did his best to compose himself "My highlight was going to my first ever human wedding. It was a beautiful day and I'm thankful to have been a part of it."

Ryder hugged Jaal while he dabbed away a few happy tears as Lexi took her turn "I suppose the highlight of my year was finally learning to lower some of my barriers and start letting people in. While I don't think any of us got through this year unscathed, we are all still here and for that I am truly thankful."

Ellis was next to speak "It's hard to pick just one highlight. This has been the best year of my life so far. I'm free from the Company and able to live a life that's my own. I'm thankful to all of you for the role you played in that and for welcoming me onto the Tempest."

Through a discrete synchronisation they added " _Thanks for letting me in Lex."_

Suvi and Ryder stood up, the Scot began "For us, the highlight of the year was getting married. But it took a lot for us to get there. We fought a Reaper with Architects. We rescued the Quarian ark and made an alliance with the Geth. Then we put a stop to the Benefactor and the Company. During that time, Liam left us, but we gained Prospero and Ellis."

Ryder continued "It's been a year of mixed blessings at times. But no matter what this galaxy has thrown at us, we've faced it and lived to tell the tale. We're thankful to each and every one of you for everything you've done for us both."

Suvi looked over at Peebee who had yet to say anything "Something the matter?"

Peebee frowned "It's impossible to pick just one highlight."

"Seems as it's you Peebee, you can have more than one." chuckled Ryder

Peebee too a deep breath and began "I got to control an Architect. We got new crew mates. We've had some amazing parties. I managed to keep the juiciest piece of gossip on the Tempest a secret," she glanced at Lexi and Ellis and winked "You're welcome by the way. Then there was Ryder and Suvi's wedding. How cute did those two look in dress whites? Drack it was adorable that you choked up and blamed it on Cora's flowers."

The Krogan playfully threw one of his snacks at her, but she ducked before continuing "Then we got two weeks off and I went relic hunting with Lexi and Ellis. I got to kiss a cute girl and I got an honorary PhD in Angaran archeology. I know that this year hasn't been easy for everyone."

Peebee looked at Cora "Some of us have had some real shitty things to deal with, but no one has had to face anything alone. We've all been there for one another. I love you guys. You're heart fungus, but you're my heart fungus and I'm thankful for that. Now anyone wanna play Twister?"

 **18th December**

Cora yawned and carefully stretched as she headed into the galley. Puck was sat waiting with a note

 _Hi ho hi ho_

 _Off to Aya we go_

 _Find something sparkly_

 _For our Christmas tree_

 _Hi ho hi ho ho ho!_

The idea of a shopping trip to Aya sounded appealing to Cora, there were still one or two gifts that she needed to get. The crew wandered around the marketplace each finding something for the tree. Suvi had chosen a couple of glittery pinecones, the fibonacci pattern in their formation a constant reminder of God's watermark in creation. Kallo had chosen a sparkly orangey red star, it reminded him of Betelgeuse back in the Milky Way. It hadn't taken them long to choose their decorations, so the pair sat in a small diner eating lunch. They chatted about their plans for the holidays and watched the comings and going of the rest of the crew.

Gil and Prospero had opted for making their own decoration by gluing together some shards of shattered Rem Tech into star shapes. The pair wandered around with Verta trying to help her pick a decoration. She settled on an ornament of a cat wearing a Santa hat, it seemed only right given that she and her sister had played no small part in Felis Catus being introduced to Andromeda.

Jaal found a pair of baubles one had been painted to represent the Andromeda galaxy, the other to represent the Milky Way. It seemed apt and a nice way to acknowledge the joining of the two galaxies.

Cora found a some baubles in swirled with the Initiative colors of blue and white. She decided that they'd do. She was more focused on buying some thank you gifts for the people who'd helped her back onto her feet.

Peebee had bought a set of Remnant bot figures painted in garish festive colours. They were trashy and tacky, but she couldn't help but like them. At the same stall Drack found a decoration of a Krogan Santa sat atop a red and green Thresher Maw. He laughed aloud in spite of himself when he saw it. He bought two, one for the tree on the Tempest and one for Kesh, Vorn and his great grandchildren.

Lexi had selected a robin decoration. She had spent a dark and dreary winter working at a little emergency department in a small seaside town in south west England. One of the med tech's had always been quite insistent that you didn't have a proper Christmas tree unless there was a jolly robin on it. Ellis had picked some red, white and green striped peppermint candy canes. Originally there had been a pack of ten but they and Lexi had eaten several as they wandered around. Now the kisses the couple shared were infused with mint.

Ryder was initially going to get a space hamster wearing a Santa hat when she saw something out of the corner of her eye. She squealed when she realized exactly what it was; a little Blasto figure wearing a Santa hat. To say that Sara Ryder was a Blasto enthusiast was an understatement. She had a whole host of collectible figures and a movie collection that she'd bought to Andromeda with her. The figures lived on her bookcase back on Elaaden. For Sara this was the perfect decoration.

Everyone met up back at the docks with their decorations ready to board the Tempest. Cora had her purchases placed into a crate to be sent back to the ship. There was beer for Dr Carlyle and a bottle of Akantha for Lexi. A silky violet dressing gown for Vetra and a new rucksacks for Peebee and Ellis. Lastly there was a bottle of rum for Ash, she hoped it would loosen his lips and he'd tell her more embarrassing stories about Peebee. The crate was open topped allowing two small stowaways climb inside. Drack was too busy talking to Peebee about dinner to notice them. He scooped up the crate in one arm and carried it back to the Tempest. He left the crate on the bridge and headed down to the cargo bay where everyone was busily hanging their decorations on the tree.

 **19th December**

Lexi's jaw dropped as she read the note beneath Puck, she was sure that Suvi and Ryder had arranged for her to be the one to find it thinking that she'd be the safest bet. She wasn't she if she should be flattered or disappointed.

 _To the finder of this note,_

 _Congratulations for one day, you are in charge of the Tempest. Over to you Captain!_

Captain T'Perro grabbed herself a mug of tea and took the note for fear of Peebee getting a hold of it. She headed off to the med bay and pondering what to do with her new found authority.

Ellis rummaged around the kitchen looking for their jerky. Drack watched with amusement as the mercenary hunted for their beloved snack "Lost something kid?"

"Yeah. You seen my pack of Adhi jerky. I could've sworn I left it in here." the mercenary got down on the floor to look under the cupboards.

"Think we've got another stowaway. The fish I was preparing has had some bites taken out of it. I was gonna blame Peebee, but she'd have taken bigger bites. I'd better go tell Ryder." Drack turned to find the woman in question stood in the galley doorway.

She raised her hands "Sorry gang I'm not in charge today. If you've got any problems take them up with acting Captain T'Perro."

Drack regretted going to see Lexi, now that she was in charge, she could order him to have an extensive medical. She ordered Cora and Vetra to go and get a pedicure, it was high time those two took it easy. Kallo tagged along opting for a mud bath that soothed his delicate amphibian skin. Gil was sent for a nap, Jaal thought this was an excellent idea and took himself back to bed. Ryder and Suvi had also been ordered to take it easy. The pair sat in bed organising the finishing touches of one of their elf antics for later that week in between kisses and sips of cold coffee. Lexi had tasked Ellis with tracking down the stowaway.

The stowaway in question was currently on the bridge curled up on a slumbering Peebee. She was catching up on her sleep after a movie marathon of the _Karate Kid_ films. The maiden's eyes drifted open and she looked down at the black, furry purring mass on her chest. As green feline eye met her gaze, it was love at first sight. She lay in her hammock stroking the silky black fur and rubbing his ears. Peebee was so absorbed in petting the cat she didn't notice Ellis arrive on the bridge and startled when a voice asked "Who's your friend?"

The cat sprang from the hammock onto a nearby work surface. Ellis reached out and started petting him. The cat purred contentedly as the mercenary scratched his ears "So you're the one that's been nicking my jerky. It's a good job you're cute. Come Peebee, Lexi will need to check him over."

Peebee lovingly scooped him up and took him to the med bay where Lexi, Suvi and Ryder were waiting. Lexi scanned the cat "He's male, just over a year old. He's suffering from malnutrition but otherwise he's in good condition."

"Mom can I keep him. Pleeeaasseee." Pleaded Peebee hugging the cat close to her.

Lexi looked at the maiden. She was pretty sure it would take a crowbar to pry the cat off of her. "Fine, on the proviso you never call me "Mom" again. Oh and he's _your_ responsibility."

Ryder began to protest "But we.."

Ryder froze. A look of terror spread across her face. The cat wasn't the only creature that had snuck aboard, a spider the size of a thumbnail had also infiltrated the ship. It was scuttering towards her at a rapid pace. The cat jumped from Peebee's arms and pounced on the eight legged intruder before gobbling it up. Peebee petted the cat "Good boy. Sorry Ryder, you were going to say something."

Now that the terrifying threat of the spider had been removed Ryder found her words again "You know what, nevermind. We're good here people."

Suvi chuckled "I give you Sara Ryder, vanquisher of the Kett, slayer of the Archon and general savior of Andromeda, also shit scared of spiders!"

Ryder stooped down and petted the cat "If he's staying, he's going to need a name."

"His name," Peebee paused for dramatic effect "Is Mister Meowgi."

 **20th December**

Sara was crashed out buried beneath the duvet. Suvi placed a kiss on her earlobe. Nothing. The science officer grinned, it was time for a spot of friendly payback. She positioned Puck and wrote out a note to her wife.

 _Report to the Pathfinders quarters at 21:00_

 _Don't be late_

Sara spent the day pondering what exactly Suvi was planning. She headed into her quarters to find Suvi waiting for her, hair still slightly damp from the shower and wrapped up in a fluffy dressing gown. Sara wrapped her arms around her and snuggled into the fleecy fabric. Suvi stepped back "I don't want you getting too comfortable, well not yet."

With a grin she untied the waistband of the dressing gown and allowed it to slowly fall from her shoulders. There was a soft thud as the garment landed on the floor. Sara drank in the view of Doctor Suvi Anwar wearing nothing but a large blue fabric bow that was tied to concealed a few strategic areas.

Suvi advanced on Sara pulling her in for kiss, fingers finding the edge of Ryder's top slowly pulling it upwards. Sara kicked off her shoes in between kisses and the odd squeak as the silky fabric of Suvi's bow tickled her newly exposed flesh. The science officer's removed remainder of Sara's clothes anointing her skin with kisses.

"Um, slight unfair advantage." Protested the newly naked Sara poking at the bow that preserved Suvi's modesty.

With a wry smirk Suvi replied "Then do something about it."

Sara's fingers gripped the end of the bow and pulled at the fabric. For the first time Sara was about to literally be Suvi's undoing, figuratively it was second nature to her.

 **21st December**

Jaal beamed with excitement, he'd said to Ryder that this was something that he wanted the crew to experience together, and now thanks to a note from a little elf, the crew of the Tempest were setting down on Voeld to observe the winter Solstice.

Despite Ryder resetting the planet's Vault, the temperature was still hatefully cold. Suvi's teeth chattered as she awkwardly bumbled around in Initiative armour. Peebee wore more or less her usual attire. When Jaal asked Cora if she thought Peebee was cold she replied "No sense, no feeling."

The truth was that Peebee had grown up on Hyetiana, she was used to the cold. She was also damned if a little snow and ice were going to get in the way of her looking amazing.

The Solstice was a holy day for the Angaran as they looked to the heavens and thought about all of their other incarnations who had gazed upon the skies of blues and greens before them. It was a time to reflect on how far the had come as a race and as individuals. They celebrated personal growth and vowed to work on their flaws. The Solstice was much a celebration of the dark as it was of the light, after all, how does one measure light without the presence of darkness. How can one ever truly appreciate happiness if they have never truly known sorrow.

Long tables were outside every dwelling including the Initiative settlements. Each was laden with food and drink that was kept warm by huge thermal lamps. There was something for every species, korkro root soup for the Krogan, dextro based broths and stews for the Turians and classic Angaran spicy spider beetle casserole. Peebee and Ryder tried a mouthful of the casserole and subsequently had to eat mouthfuls of snow in a bid to counteract the burning of their tongues. Cora rolled her eyes and hoped to the Goddess the two hadn't committed some terrible interspecies faux pas. Jaal didn't seem to be offended though, instead he roared with laughter at the spectacle. "Good to see you sampling the Anagaran cuisine, however spicy spider beetle casserole is not for the faint hearted."

"No kidding!" Mumbled Ryder, her lips still burning from the chilli like spice.

"Totally worth it." Wheezed Peebee as Ellis hauled her to her feet and Lexi gave her a once over.

Suvi wrapped her arms around Ryder in the vain hope it would help her feel warmer. The lingering spices from the casserole made Suvi's lips tingle as she kissed her. It wasn't quite the warmth she had in mind. Kallo handed each of the pair an insulated mug filled with hot apple and cinnamon.

"Now," began Jaal gesturing skywards "If you look up, you'll see the real reason I wanted you all to come here."

Everyone looked up. The sun was all but gone and the light show was beginning. The sky was streaked with waves of blue and green that rippled across the darkness. Jaal reflected upon the good that had been done in Andromeda this year. The rescue of the Quarian Ark, the destruction of the Reaper and the end of the Benefactor and the sinister Company. He hoped his actions would make his predecessors proud and build a better future for the people he'd yet to become.

Suvi placed a hand on Ellis's shoulder "How are you finding all of this? I know you don't have a lot of experience with religion what with the Company banning you from studying it."

"I'm still trying to figure it all out. Don't know as I ever will, but I know I don't believe in chance." the mercenary offered.

Suvi was intrigued "So, what do you believe?"

Ellis looked around at the crew. Not so long ago they had been strangers, now they were friends. Some were like family and of course there was Lexi; the one that had stolen their heart. The mercenary smiled "I believe I'm exactly where I'm meant to be."

 **22nd December**

Hey Ash,

So while I love the idea of having the party at Engo's, I'm still banned from there along with most of the crew. I know they do some of the best cheese platters in Andromeda, but it won't be much of a night out if none of us, including the guest of honour can get in there. I know you're wondering exactly what your favourite sister did to get banned, but for the record, it wasn't just me. It all started off last Christmas in engineering, that's where Gil found Puck the elf and a note saying

 _You are all invited to the Tempest crew Christmas party_

 _Starts at 19:00 hours, don't be late_

Or words to that effect. Gil grabbed the box of crackers that he'd been hiding from the eternally boring Cora and set to work modifying the snaps. I let him do it in my room so Ryder wouldn't catch wind of what he was up to. He wanted to make the party go with a bang and who was I to stand in his way?

Engo's was reputed to be the finest eatery on Meridian, annoyingly it still is. Ryder and Suvi had booked out the entire restaurant for the evening. We all deserved to cut loose without anyone watching us. Ryder's Mom Ellen and Harry had been invited, though both had declined because of a "prior engagement". While Ryder didn't catch on, Lexi's smirking made me think that there might be something going on between Harry and Ryder's mom. But that's another story. Scott had been invited too but he was on duty working with Hayjer. I think he just wanted to avoid Cora, it wasn't that long after they'd split up. Which we all know turned out to be for the best.

There was the traditional festive fare for the humans and Asari's, along with celebratory dishes more geared up to Anagaran, Turian and Salarian tastes. Drack managed to sideline an entire roast turkey for himself along with a load of Krogan root vegetables. I tried pretty much everything on the menu that I knew wouldn't kill me. The flavours were incredible and totally worth the gas that I had the following day! I stunk out the entire bridge!

We arrived dressed in our civilian clothing (I was rocking my favourite dress, you know the one the would've given Amelia a heart attack) and sat around this huge circular table. Ryder insisted I sat between Lexi and Ellis in the hopes that the pair could keep me in check. Unfortunately Ryder hadn't taken into account that Lexi would also drinking that evening. Lexi plus lots of Akantha equals dancing!

Kallo was the designated sober crew mate, poor guy. He was in charge of administering recovery shots to everyone and he was in charge of awarding the prize for best abuse of biotic powers. I was going to try and win it by undoing this stuck up waiter's belt and fly so his trouser would drop to his ankles while he was serving Gil, but Lexi threatened to stab me with her fork if I did.

Prospero was in charge of the all bets that we'd placed for the evening like the first to get drunk, first to cry, and first to fall asleep. Cora wasn't drinking either as alcohol and her pain meds didn't mix. Personally the idea of Cora being high as a kite as was kind of appealing. Maybe if she relaxed enough we'd finally be able to pull that huge stick out of her ass. Anyways, where was I?

Ah, yeah, the crackers! Gil chuckled as he sat down "Right, first order of business, who wants to pull a cracker?"

Cora instinctively used her biotics to pull the nearest fire extinguisher into her hand "Okay we're good to go."

Ryder and Suvi pulled the first cracker, we were all expecting a huge explosion, but instead small plumes of blue and white smoke emerged from the snapped end. Vetra and Drack went next again little plumes of pretty coloured smoke rose up, but nothing more. The rest were the same. I was a little disappointed. I mean it's not a proper staff party until something's on fire right? You taught me that, or was it Drack?

But Gil was happy "See I'm a master of banging things in more ways than one!" with that he snapped the last remaining cracker with Ellis. A small spark flew through the air, landing on Gil's beard and setting it alight. Now it was a proper party.

Ellis was laughing "Oi master of banging things, your beards on fire!"

They extinguished the beard fire by throwing their glass of water in his face. Gil shrugged "I was going to shave it off before I went home anyway."

Ryder chuckled "Sure and I'm the Queen of Andromeda!"

Without missing a beat, Gil took her hand, kissed it and bowed "Your highness."

Suvi burst out laughing. Not sure if that was because of Gil or because I snuck behind Ryder and stuck a bright yellow paper crown on her head. "Before you get ideas above your station, a goddess trumps a queen any day."

Cora looked like she was about saying something, but instead waited until I sat back down then started flicking her unwanted sprouts at me. One nearly landed in my wine glass. I laughed and mocked "Ha missed.."

The rest of my sentence was rudely cut off as Cora used her biotics to fire a sprout straight into my open mouth. I couldn't help it, I bit into the vegetable and Goddess it was vile! I've stuck some pretty questionable things in my mouth over the years, but nothing's ever tasted as bad as that!

I had to down my wine to get rid of the grossness. "Blurgh! What are you trying to do? Kill me?"

Cora smirked "Don't be so melodramatic! Anyway there's far too many witnesses."

Drack laughed so hard he cried and sprayed Ryncol everywhere at the same time. Luckily none of it caught the lit candles that were on the table, otherwise, screw firebreathing thresher maws, we'd have had a fire breathing Korgan! Now wouldn't that be something? Still I was twenty credits out of pocket as I'd bet that Jaal was going to be the first to cry.

He patted Cora on the back of her hand all proud "I taught you well kid!"

I'd bet that Lexi would be the first to get drunk, but it was actually Gil and Vetra. They were testing out a new drinking game called Festive earworm. They were taking turns to hum, whistle or sing a Christmas tune. If anyone got the song stuck in their head, they took a shot. Turns out Suvi and Ellis are really susceptible, so Vetra and Gil got trashed pretty quickly. I also discovered Glaswegians know a dirty version of just about every Christmas song ever written!

Drack was full of food and Ryncol it wasn't long before he dozed off at the table. Everyone had bet that he'd be the first to fall asleep, so zero prize money to be had there. Up till now the best abuse of biotic power had been Cora pulling a fire extinguisher to her (and the sprout incident) but now with a few drinks on board, Ryder was feeling mischievous. She used her biotics to lift this bright pink paper hat from one of Gil's crackers and put it on Drack's head. We tried not to laugh too loudly, no one wanted to wake Drack. He looked both peaceful and kinda ridiculous at the same time. I'd almost go as far as to say cute, but Drack would totally kick my ass.

Cora was yawning, I think everything that she'd gone through was catching up with her. Jaal was half asleep too, he was still tired from all that partying on Voeld the night before. Lightweights, but because they left early and missed all the fun, they're the only members of the crew allowed to set foot back in Engo's again. The rest of us were banned for life.

I wouldn't have said Lexi was totally drunk, but she was definitely under the Akantha's influence. I noticed it and jumped at the chance to get the good doctor to loosen up. I headed onto the dance floor dragging her with me. Ellis's jaw dropped along with several other crew member's. We all knew that Lexi's mom had been a dancer on Omega, but it had never occurred to any of us that Lexi could actually dance. She was really going for it!

She made eyes at Ellis from the dance floor and tried to get them to join her. Ellis shook their head, the most anyone had taught them was how to slow dance, this was way out of their league. Even I was struggling to keep up with Doctor Bust A Move.

Next thing I know, Ellis is wrapped up in a ripple of dark blue energy as Lexi used her biotics to pull them onto the dance floor. Lexi didn't really dance with Ellis, it was more like she used them as a pole to dance against. This was strike one. It turns out the restaurant didn't take kindly to pole dancing in their premises, especially when the pole was an actual person. Ellis on the other hand didn't mind in the slightest.

I'm sure Kallo felt bad about jabbing those two with recovery shots, he was all apologetic explaining that Lexi would need to check in on Cora and the Ellis's biotics would be needed to drag Drack back to the Tempest.

Strike two was thanks to Vetra and Gil reenacting the lift scene from Dirty Dancing. Vetra was channeling her inner Johnny Castle while Gil was fully embracing the role of Frances "Gilly" Houseman. He loudly declared "No one puts Gilly in the corner!" as he leapt off a table into Vetra's open arms. There was one small problem. Well two actually. The first was that Verta was way too drunk to catch Gil. The second was that Gil had totally miscalculated the jump and was about to faceplant the ground. It would have been hilarious, but kinda painful for Gil. Everyone with biotics sprang into action and we managed to catch him before he hit the ground "Thanks gang! You're the best! Now, any chance you could use your biotics to help us finish this number?"

That was when strike three happened as the four of us we exchanged looks and nodded. We lifted Gil back onto the table then catapulted him off it again making him perform a couple of somersaults as he went. Then we lowered him into Vetra's arms. Vetra tried to grip his waist, but ended up grabbing Gil's ass instead. Gil was giggling "Steady on Vetra, you could at least buy me a drink first!"

If things had stopped there, we'd all still have been welcome at Engo's. But it was at this point that the fourth and final strike happened. Drack woke up. He yawned, stretched and knocked his glass of Ryncol over along with a candle. In a matter of seconds, the whole table was on fire, and that's how we all got banned from the best restaurant on Meridian.

So I'm thinking how about we do this on Kadara instead? People don't get so bent outta shape over things being set on fire over there.

P.S Cora got the prize for best abuse of biotics for firing that stinking sprout into my mouth! Moral of the story, never sit opposite Cora at the dinner table! Or set said table on fire.

 **23rd December**

Ellis was still half asleep as they trudged into the galley in search of caffeine. Puck was sat atop one of the cupboards with a note tacked beneath him reading

 _To the first to find this note_

 _Do something you find difficult for someone you care about_

Ellis suspected that Suvi had orchestrated this one especially for them. The Scot had been helping Ellis learn to read since they had joined the Tempest, but reading aloud was something that terrified them. They'd clam up the moment that anyone other than Suvi was in the room. Ellis contemplated skulking off and letting someone else take on the task. No. This was their challenge and they would do it.

Some time later Ellis approached Suvi, note in hand "I suspect you're behind Puck's latest stunt. I need to ask a favour, can I borrow one of your books?"

Later that evening the mercenary went into Lexi's room carrying mugs of hot chocolate and an old, well loved book from Suvi's collection. The doctor peered up from her datapad as the mercenary handed her a mug and the letter from Puck. Lexi saw the battered book tucked under Ellis' arm and guessed what was about to happen. This wasn't just something that Ellis found hard, it was something that out right scared them. She kissed them softly on the cheek "You don't have to do this."

Ellis nodded, but cleared their throat and began "T'was the night before Christmas, when all thro' the house not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse."

The mercenary stumbled over the odd word, but carried on with it determined to see it through until they'd finished with "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night."

Ellis put down the book and looked over at Lexi, the doctor had tears in her eyes and a smile on her lips "That was beautiful."

She wrapped her arms around Ellis and pulled them in close saying "Promise me something, that you'll read this to me every Christmas."

Ellis stole a brief kiss before answering "I promise."

 **24th December**

Peebee felt disappointed as she read the elf's final note.

 _It's been fun to stay with you_

 _But sadly now, my missions through_

 _If you look then you will find_

 _Something that I left behind_

Peebee began to frantically search the ship, starting with the galley. She made enough noise to wake the dead, so naturally the entire crew came to see what was going on. They directed her to the cargo bay where a large crate red crate was sat. Prospero handed her a crow bar and she pried it open. The crate was crammed full of gifts for each of the crew, the items were labelled with handwriting that bore a striking resemblance to Ryder's. Suvi began to hand out the gifts, first up was Kallo. He beamed as he was handed a 3D printed scale model of the Tempest, while a gobsmacked Vetra was reunited with her long lost lamp of the naked Asari. The Turian wondered what lengths the couple had gone through to find it for her.

For Drack there was a datapad filled with a collection of children's stories from the Milky Way and Andromeda alike for him to read to his great grandchildren.

Gil smelt the selection of unusual hops and malts that had given to him. He'd be able to make some incredible home brews with them, a nice ruby ale perhaps.

Jaal choked up as he was presented with a frying pan. Since his master class from Drack he'd become an adept pancake maker. Now he'd be able to make them at his home on Voeld.

Cora's thumb ran over the smooth surface of her gift; a deep blue Asari worry stone. The other side of the disc shaped stone featured a prayer to the Goddess asking her to watch over those who fought in her service. It made Cora wonder quite what the Goddess had in mind for her. If nothing else, she had been blessed with thoughtful friends.

Lexi unscrewed the lid on the bottle of bubble bath and breathed in the lavender scent, an appreciative smile spread across her face. It was a thoughtful gift. She planned to try it out as soon as she got back to Elaaden preferably with a glass of Akantha.

Prospero was gifted a carbon fibre leg casings with integrated compartments for tools. The Geth calculated that this would improve his efficiency by 27.3%.

Suvi handed over her copy of _The night before Christmas_ to a stunned Ellis _._ It was the first Christmas present the mercenary ever received. They hugged her in thanks, unable to find the words to articulate their gratitude.

Last, but by no means least was Peebee who was handed a blue a white collar with a bell on it for Meowgi.

The next lot of gifts to be handed out were the Secret Santa ones. They'd all been placed in a basket near the cargo bay door and Ryder handed them out to the crew as everyone said their goodbyes and prepared to go their separate ways for Christmas.

Cora, Prospero, Jaal and Gil would be spending the next few days on Eos. They were all having Christmas dinner at Gil's place and Boxing Day festivities would be held at Cora's.

Kallo and Vetra would be meeting with Sid and enjoying the holiday season together on Kadara. They planned to eat far too much food and watch a load of cheesy human Christmas films.

Everyone else was headed off to Elaaden. Drack would be spending time with Kesh, Vorn and the children telling stories and cooking.

Lexi would be spending the holidays with Ellis. The pair had initially planned a quiet couple of days together, but that had gone out the window when Peebee managed to wrangle an invitation to stay with them. Deep down they both cared for Peebee and knew Christmas would be anything but dull with her and Meowgi around.

Sara, Suvi and Rabbit were home at last. They took Rabbit for a walk before collectively flopping down on the sofa to watch _Blasto saves Christmas_. It was the couples intention to stay up and see in Christmas, but by 22:30 Sara was sound asleep in Suvi's arms. There was no way that she could carry the slumbering Pathfinder to bed, so she resigned herself to sleeping on the sofa. She offered up a prayer of gratitude for her friends and newly forged family. Then, she gently placed a kiss on her wife's forehead and whispered "Merry Christmas Sara."


End file.
